Mimi's New Doll

It's been only 3 weeks or so since Kuri joined our family.

The changes, as I suppose we expected, have been tremendous. Particularly for Mimi. Granted, Sumie and I are on completely different schedules now, and our routines are thrown completely out of whack, but we both knew this would happen. We saw it coming. Mimi, on the other hand, had only a vague impression that a baby was one the way. What this would really mean she couldn't begin to fathom. Thankfully, she's adapting to our addition remarkably well.

Over the weekend we had a visit from Great Grandma and Aunt Marilyn.

Kuri was passed around a lot.

Mimi didn't let all the attention Kuri was getting get to her. She jumped right in and shared in the visit.

She also bided her time. I think she's learning that even though Kuri is often the center of attention, he can't take that much of it. Before long, he needs to eat, sleep, or be changed. As such, Mimi's now beginning to wait for these "openings" and then pounce. Here she is with Great Grandma when Kuri finally went into nap mode.

Another change we've seen is that Mimi now really loves pretending to be a mom.  She always enjoyed this - dressing up her dolls and bringing them food from time to time - but now it's almost like a part-time occupation. Several times a day we'll find some kind of doll or stuffed animal tucked into bed, dressed in one of Kuri's outfits, or sitting in front of a plate of plastic food.

Nyan-nyan, Mimi's favorite stuffed animal, got the full treatment the other day.

Just as Mimi is now treating her favorite toys as real babies, she has also taken to treating her little brother as a favorite toy.  She likes to dress him up as an older man from time to time.

She really likes to cuddle with him - just like Mama does.

The cuddles generally turn to hugs...

 ...but that can only hold her interest for so long. Kuri is also a bit of a test lab for Mimi. As soon as we see her index finger come out, we know she's thinking, "Hmm. I wonder what he'll do if I do this?"

9 times out of 10, it's the same response.

Despite the poking and prodding, Kuri is definitely fascinated by Mimi. He'll look up at his Mama and me when we're holding him, but the person who really holds his attention, who really captivates him, is Mimi. Even at 3 weeks we can tell he adores her. As for standing up for himself, that will come in time. Right now, he simply doesn't have the backbone for it. Figuratively and literally.

In the quiet times, when Mama and Papa are cooking and reading and Kuri's feeding or sleeping, Mimi loses herself in coloring and drawing. We recently made an Ikea run and picked up some counter stools so Mimi could keep us company when we're in the kitchen.

And sometimes, with Kuri's sleep schedule, the "original three" still get together to celebrate some very special events. Mimi sang Happy Birthday to her Mama all by herself the other night. She also shared Mama's cake.

What has amazed us more than anything else over the past few weeks is how our family is now genuinely coming together. We were always close (never really thought we could be closer), but already I can't imagine life with less than this group of four. I hope the other three all feel the same way.

New Baby Addition Edition

He's here. And ahead of schedule.

Friday night, around 11:00pm, Sumie and I were planning out our last weekend without baby. We'd head up to the cute downtown in Novato for some Indian food, perhaps look at some antiques, and then take Mimi to the park. Sunday would be spent in quiet anticipation and luxurious relaxation, both of us knowing that we didn't have to wake up early for work on Monday.

Plans have a way of being just that - plans. By 12:15am Saturday morning, Sumie and I were in the car, with a very groggy Mimi in the backseat, heading for San Francisco and the Labor and Delivery ward. Someone wanted to take part in our weekend.

But he wasn't going to join us right away. By 2:00am it was apparent that our little man was going to take his time, so Mimi and I trudged back to the car to finish the night's sleep up in Marin while Sumie stayed behind to sleep between the occasional contraction (she's hard core). By 7:00am Grandma had arrived and I was on my way back down the hill to the hospital.

Reunited at the hospital, Sumie and I began the waiting game. We watched our son's heartbeat on the monitor, as well as the progress of other mothers and their soon-to-be sons and daughters. We'd see them come in, we'd see them come out. Our boy, however, was methodical. He'd planned a late afternoon arrival and he'd be damned if he'd see it any other way.

Things really took off around 3:30 or so and by 4:00, on the dot, Christopher Yoshinobu Kemp made his appearance. At 6lbs 9ozs he was light, but also a lanky 21inches.  He immediately took to his Mama, who, somehow, looked as fresh and bright as ever despite being up for nearly 36 hours and undergoing labor.

I, however, despite a shower that morning, was not nearly so photogenic.  Kuri (our nickname for Christopher) thankfully didn't mind.

Later that evening I headed back up to Marin (my third trip that Saturday) to fetch Mimi and Grandma. Mimi had been an amazing girl for Grandma all day. We were all so proud of her. And we were even more proud when she smiled at her little brother for the first time.

We were both a little worried about how Mimi would respond, but on the whole, she's really taken to him.

Grandma also got some time in with Kuri. From what I've heard of my own behavior as an infant, he was a welcome change to hold.

By the end of the evening, Mimi was beginning to have a few second thoughts about this new addition to the family. As someone who is used to being the absolute center of attention, regardless of the venue, I think Mimi handled it pretty well. She's still adjusting here at home (that's a future post, for sure), but she always has a smile for her little brother. It's Mama and Papa she's a little annoyed with, I think.

Unlike his big sister, Kuri has so far been a quiet crier and a consistent sleeper. 9 times out of 10, if you look for Kuri, you'll find him like this.

During the day, he really loves his rocker.

But at night, he's attached to Mama. We're still working on our sleep schedules (Kuri's not a big fan of sleeping away from Mama, particularly at night), but we're getting there.

We don't know what the future will hold for this new addition to our family, but we are certain that we're glad he's finally here.

12 Days On, 2 Days Off

We're quite happy it's Friday around here.  The weekend has been well-earned.

As part of her new position, Sumie takes call for a full week at a time.  The shift begins on a Friday morning, passes through the weekend, and finally comes to a close the morning of the following Friday. Thankfully, this week her call shift has been relatively light - no 2am emergency pages - but it has made for some very long days, and an even longer week.  A 12-day week, in fact.

Sumie did an amazing job over this last call.  No matter how tired she might have been, or how early she had woken up that day, once she got home she was all Mimi's.  I can't begin to share just how proud I am of her for being there for Mimi so thoroughly and consistently.  Mimi's thankful, too.  She may not be able to say so yet, but given that she yells out "Mama!" with unbridled eagerness whenever she hears the garage door, I think it's pretty apparent.

Naturally, when Sumie's on call it means that I, to a certain degree, am on "Papa-call."  Weekends are like weekdays - just me and Mimi - and I can't go out evenings as Sumie may be called in.  The first time I took Papa-call, several weeks ago, I went a bit haywire.  I've always liked having time to myself and, as I've discovered, toddlers are not very good at giving parents their "space."  As the week progressed, I felt more and more tied down.  Though I was technically free to do whatever I wanted, my actions had to meet with Mimi's approval.  As such, freedom only came at nap time.

Because the last one was a little rough, I was anxious about going through this week's call with Mimi.  I'm very thankful to report that things have improved.  The week really has, for reasons I can't fully explain, been a joy.  Though Mimi and I have had our disagreements (7 or 8 regarding the reading of books have occurred while writing this blog post.  Mimi won every time.) we're learning how to live with each other in relative harmony.  She's starting to get that when Papa's in his chair, Papa's working.  And I'm starting to get that even when I'm in my chair, sometimes there are things, like a quick book read, that supercede whatever I'm working on.

One major difference between the last Papa-call and this one has been how Mimi and I interact.  Only a few weeks ago, the relationship felt much more like care-giver and client.  But now, it's more like we're playmates.

I'm still in charge - at least theoretically - and she still drives me nuts on a regular basis, but there's a much greater sense of play, and even teamwork, in all that we do.  It's almost as if our small, daily actions - reading, flashcards, drawing, eating, napping, shopping, etc. - are helping us to form a greater dialog.  In other words, there feels to be some actual two-way communication now!

I didn't expect the change, but it is a very welcome and very heartwarming one.  I guess both Mimi and I have grown up a bit this last week.

Granted, one of us still likes to crawl under the coffee table, but I think we'll let that one slide.

An Average Evening: Lemons, Helicopters, and Passing Out

On most evenings we have about 2-3 hours after Sumie gets home before Mimi goes to bed.  This is our family time and it's generally filled with cooking and eating dinner, washing up, putting Mimi's toys away seven or eight times, the occasional bath, and reading stories.  It's a pretty full slate for only three hours, but Mimi is somehow able to impose her own agenda as well each night.

Several nights ago Mimi decided to take a liking to lemons.  Around 6:30pm she decided that lemons were her new favorite toy.  I still don't fully understand the attraction - she doesn't drink lemonade, take lemon in her milk, poach halibut in a lemon butter sauce, or even suck on sour lemon drops - but I suppose they are colorful, smell good, fun to throw, and make a satisfying "thunk" when they land on the kitchen tile. 

Mimi managed to play with this basket of yellow citrus for over an hour. 

 I think she'll enjoy lemonade in the future.  Here she is attempting to drink a lemon.  She doesn't quite have the concept, yet. 

The evening isn't all about citrus love, however.  Mimi's joys are always counterbalanced by things that make her scream, whine, or cower.  This time it was my remote control helicopter.  This noisy little flea, which weighs little more than an ounce or so, struck abject terror into Mimi at first. 

But with time, and a few gentle passes overhead, she began to find it interesting. 

By the end of the evening she'd applaud each successful landing.  And yes, it is difficult to fly a helicopter and to take pictures at the same time.

I've always loved machines, but I had no idea one could bond so quickly with a helicopter.  It makes me wonder.  Does she think it's an animal, like her stuffed dog and cat?  Does it have free will in her world?  Does it want to be friends?  Can it be trusted?  Why does Papa sometimes follow it around the house?  I wish that I could peek inside. 

Once we're done with dinner, and we've gone through Mimi's flashcards and a few books, it's time for Mimi's bedtime bottle.  I guess it had been a long day because Mimi, who usually sucks down her bottle in 5 minutes to return to play, was soon completely passed out.  Must've been some pretty strong milk...

Tuckered out, Papa takes her to bed.  At 16 months she's just taken to laying her head on my shoulder.  She'd always keep her head up as an infant, but now that she's a little older she seems to take some comfort in Papa's ample padding.  Maybe it's just that the house is rather cold and Papa radiates a lot of heat...

Mimi generally sleeps through the night and wakes the next morning ready to play.  Here she is still in her jammies.  She insisted that I take this picture in front of my MacBook with my iPhone as a little "thank you" to Steve Jobs.  She knows the role he played in making sharing Mimi's life so much easier than it would have been even 5 years ago. 

But with each passing there is a new arrival.  Just this morning Mimi learned that she has a new baby cousin.  Haruki Ling was born this morning to Kae and Eddie Ling around 6:00am!  Mimi will be working hard to become a good role model for him, I'm sure of it. 

A Day for Meat Wrapped in Dough

The Richmond District of San Francisco, though rather foggy, has a lot to offer.  First off, it's between two fantastic parks: Golden Gate Park to the south and the Presidio to the north.  Second, there are multiple mini-parks as well.  Perfect for a quick afternoon play session.  Here's Mimi making her way through a tunnel for the first time!  She was a bit unsure at first, as usual, but soon loved it and refused to come out.  My body was...how shall I say this...a bit too generously proportioned to go in and get her out. 

Third, though the neighborhood, particularly Clement street, is known as San Francisco's second Chinatown, there's a wealth of astounding and affordable restaurants hailing from almost every culture across the board.  Dim Sum is cheap and plentiful at "Good Luck" on Clement, the Banh Mi (Vietnamese Sandwiches) are to die for at Little Vietnam Cafe on 6th ave, and the best garlic sausage you'll ever find is at the Seakor Polish Deli on Geary.  Mix in some fabulous pizza at Giorgio's, savory burritos at Gordo, and a few succulent burgers at Bill's Place, and the Richmond gives many Manhattan neighborhoods a run for their money. 

The historical Irish and current Russian population also adds to the culinary prowess of the neighborhood, particularly when it comes to the meat stuffed in dough category.  Stuffed pies and pastries are foodstuffs sadly overlooked here in America.  We have the often poorly produced pot pie, as well as bagel and corn dogs, but nothing to match a good English or Irish pasty.  And that brings me to John Campbell's Irish Bakery and their perfectly filling $5.00 pasty.  It's basically a shepherd's pie in flaky crust.  How can you go wrong?

But if $5.00 is a bit too steep, may I suggest a peroshki.  The Moscow and Tbilisi bakery offers beef piroshkis, each the size of 7 churros, for a mere $2.00 a piece.  If ever I need to live on $4.00 a day, this restaurant is how I would do so.  The picture below is but a snippet of the entire piroshki, pared down so that it could feed me, Mimi, and half of Wisconsin. 

Why have we, as Americans, forsaken these amazing foods.  They're inexpensive, portable, filling, and delicious!  Even Japan has their own take on them with the curry donut!  I can't explain it.  And don't try to say that calzones or, God forbid, "Hot Pockets" are the same thing.  That's just not the case.

Even babies love them.  After just a month, Mimi has already become a devoted fan.  Of course, a piroshki needs to be part of a balanced meal - like the one below with hearty udon noodles and tasty, vegetable-laden salad.

As you can see, Mimi approves.

Cooking for Mimi is often a challenge.  She rarely likes the same thing from one day to the next.  We're lucky if we can stretch what appears to be a favorite food into the next meal.  But, for some reason, she consistently devours pasties and piroshkis without complaint.  Perhaps she is my child after all...

Wake up! I Wanna Play!

Twice a day this phrase blares from the confines of Mimi's bedroom.  Closed doors and solid walls cannot hold it back.  Granted, she does not put her request so concisely and ungrammatically.  In the morning, Mimi brings out her father with either a massive and piercing wail - which could wake a heroin addict from even the deepest stupor - or with sweet and gentle babble, which I imagine is her personal commentary on the skill with which she's thrown her bedclothes to the floor.  In the afternoon, between 2pm and 4pm, Papa will be called from his book or his writing with a gentle to aggressively insistent "ih-hi, ih-hi, ih-hi, aaaaaahhhhhhhh!"  No matter what, though, when I go in to get her, I'm always greeted with a sweet smile.  It helps to take the sting off those cut-short mornings and interrupted afternoon naps.  

Yesterday though, for the first time, this same phrase was uttered in my home with Mimi sound asleep.  That's right.  I said it.  I was bored.  I didn't want to read.  I didn't want to watch Top Gear.  All I wanted to do was play with my loveable, but insane, little girl.  And so, I wanted her to wake up.

I opened the door to her room.  On any other day this would be absolute folly, bordering on the edge of suicidal behavior.  But I didn't care.  This was going against every previous fiber of my being.  Each afternoon and each evening - and I don't think this is going to change, actually - I start yearning for Mimi's eyes to get heavy.  When they do, and she finally submits to the crib, it means I get a little precious time to myself.  This time is worth its weight in myrrh (and this calculation is done with each half-hour equating to 2 metric tons).  Here I was with time to myself - I could listen to music, play Gran Turismo, eat a burrito, read European history focused on the 1930s and 1940s, search for vintage audiophile gear, the possibilities were endless - and yet all I wanted to do was submit myself to the whims of a little girl who says "Wee!" like a chain-smoking and drunken Frenchman.

To be honest, our playtime gets more fun each day.  With each new activity I see more and more of her individual personality coming out.  Of course, sometimes it's unpleasant (random passion for or hatred of certain books, for example), but most of the time she surprises me and leaves me laughing.  I never really know what's going to happen.

Here are a few pictures of Mimi at play.  The first three were taken at the Children's Park in Golden Gate Park, which is just phenomenal on a sunny day.  Like her father, Mimi has a passion for water.  Despite the many toys and distractions, she always makes a beeline for the flooded section of the sandbox.  This makes for a messy stroll home, but she loves it!

And then there's the backyard.  Fewer distractions here, so yesterday Mimi decided she'd be mesmerized by the sky.  This was cute until our next door neighbor decided to introduce herself, for the first time, just as Mimi was pretending to be a pseudo-philosophical college student high on some very introspective pot.   

Me wanting Mimi to wake up, despite it resulting in less time to myself, has been a welcome development.  It's rather sad to think that before I know it Mimi will have little interest in playing with her father.  She'll just want to text her friends.  And that's why I need to make the most of the time I have with her now.  It's also why she's not getting an active mobile phone until she's 27.

The First Born: Parentally Challenged

Last night Mimi played host to all of her Japanese cousins to celebrate her aunt Kayo's birthday.  By 6pm our little home was inundated with 6 relatively sedate adults and their 5 little ones.  Mimi, the youngest, worked extra hard (i.e. yelled even louder than usual) to make sure she wasn't lost in the shuffle.

Here's Mimi with her cousin Nana.  "Just a moment.  I'm drinking my milk!"  Nothing, not even family, comes between Mimi and her bottle. 

Steve's personal toy collection proved to be immensely popular and provided an excellent source of entertainment for the kids (and some level of anxiety for Steve).  Yes, if you haven't guessed already, that's an original Transformers "Megatron" in Shuhei's excited, but actually quite gentle, hands.  "Jetfire" looks on as Mimi goes to work on "Thrust" who, shortly after this photo, had both his wings ripped off and thrown into the other room.  That's my darling little girl.

Although Mimi was the youngest in the group, she was definitely not the most inhibited.  She's much closer in age to Sayuri and Asuka, who are both the second born in their families, but when it comes to temperament, she seems to take after her older cousins, both first born like her.  This surprised me at first, but then I got to thinking: maybe, despite family differences, all first-born children go through a somewhat similar experience.  Parenting has perhaps the steepest learning curve of any profession.  It's not that new parents do anything wrong, they just don't do much right.  And this has to leave some sort of imprint on the kids; something that all first-born share. 

But why is it that all new parents are so similarly challenged?  Shouldn't parenting be innate?  We see it, experience it, and talk about it all our lives, so why, when it finally comes our turn, do we struggle so?  I still don't know for sure, but this morning, while passing a laundromat, I stumbled across a possible analogy.

Sheet Folding and the First Child

It's the first day of your new job as a professional bed sheet folder for Reynholm Industries.  You are charged with expertly folding 300 individual sheets by the end of the day.  At 30-something years old you've done your fair share or laundry and feel confident that folding sheet after freshly-pressed sheet shouldn't be all that much of a challenge. 


How wrong you are.  The first 20 to 30 sheets you fold are a massive challenge.  Your hands never seem to move the cloth correctly and the resulting pile of linen is a haphazard and jumbled mess.  However, by the 50th sheet you seem to be getting the hang of it.  At the 100th sheet you are really moving along and with excellent accuracy.  This continues all the way up to around sheet 280 or so.  You're almost finished and, with the prospect of a free afternoon and some cash thanks to a job well done, you stop thinking about your work and start focusing on the evening to come.  You get a bit lazy and your folding, while still acceptable, is definitely sub-par.  

Right now, as a new parent, I'm still making my way through those first 100 sheets.  I think I may be somewhere around sheet 37.  There's still a long way to go.  Hopefully, by the next kid, I'll be around sheet 100 or so and I'll be able to forget that I ever proposed this rather sheety analogy (sorry, I couldn't help it).

Cute on the Front Lines

One of the benefits to living in San Francisco is being immersed in living history.  Everywhere you turn there's a link to the past, be it a building, a monument, or even a transportation system.  New York, since its inception, has been a city bent on transforming itself.  Only recently has an earnest effort been made to protect and preserve some of the city's gems.  Our old apartment building, the Cherokee, is one of these landmarks.  San Francisco, on the other hand, has done a better job of maintaining the massive architectural and engineer projects, as well as the historical homes and neighborhoods, that not only give a great city its character, but also tell its story.

A vital and strategic port to the U.S. since 1850, San Francisco also has a tremendous and well-represented military history.  As a kid I remember taking a trip to the Marine Mammal Sanctuary, which is up in Marin.  Seeing the process of sea lion rehabilitation was interesting, but what really fascinated me were all the nuclear material warning signs above the doors to the massive, and now defunct, missile silos.  The bay area is filled with these visitable and explorable nuggets of military history.  They're seamlessly blended into the parks, waterfronts, and thoroughfares.  And so, as a military history buff, it was time to take Mimi for a quick visit to one of the old battery installations along the coast.

Unfortunately, many of the installations were under renovation, but we were able to get down to Baker Beach and toddle around the battlements.

All the strolling soon tired Mimi out, so she sat back in the clover (it wasn't actually clover, I just don't know the name of the green stuff she's sitting on).  She must've liked the view because she was content for a good 20 minutes.

The fog was quickly rolling in, so we had to cut our visit short.  Here's a picture of the Golden Gate.  Obviously, this is not how it's most often photographed, but for me, this is how I tend to think of it: shrouded in fog.  Often like much of this surprisingly cold city!

At least there's some sunshine in the forecast for next week.  Maybe we'll be able to get across the bridge and see those sea lions again.