A Month Without Mimi

This past month has been a genuinely odd one.

Our oldest, age 8, boarded a plane with her mama about a month ago and headed across the Pacific. One week later, Mama came back but Mimi stayed on with her cousins and grandparents. For the past three weeks she has attended school in Japan, eaten a ton of ice cream, and occasionally, sleepily, FaceTimed with her family back in the states.

There are, sadly, no pictures of her departure. We simply dropped Mama and Mimi off. We had considered walking in to the terminal, but given how much time they had, and the fact Mari was screaming her head off that she wanted to go on the airplane, drop off was probably the best choice.

We naturally had some reservations about sending Mimi away for a whole month at such a young age, but the time with her family, and experiencing a different culture for an extended time far outweighed those fears. We knew it would be a challenge, but we also knew she was up for it. So far, it looks like she's risen to the occasion.

Mari and Kuri took Mimi's absence in stride. They were happy but knew something was a bit off. Kuri never cried about it, but for the first week or so, at least every other day, he'd look up at me and say, completely unprompted, "Papa, I miss Mimi."

"I know, buddy. Me too."

As Mimi stormed Japan, we had a bit of our own fun back here. The first week was tough with just the two kids and me. Few pictures of this time survive, though both kids and their father made it through relatively unscathed.

I had a bit of help that week as one of my best friends from elementary school, John, came down with his wife Jen for a visit. We met up with our friend from intermediate school, Mike, as well as his wife and kids, for some serious pinball action at the Pinball Museum in Alameda. That little boy in blue is Kuri and Mike is right behind him. Note the level of concentration on both faces. Given Mike's a pretty damn good pinball player, I think the boy will go far.

As John, Mike, Jen, and Cassandra play on the left, you can see Kuri still working away on the right. I was amazed by his concentration. He tried machines until he found one that clicked with him and then kept with it. Seeing his potential that day, I've come to the conclusion that it really isn't fair to such a child, with so much innate pinball talent, to have only one machine at home. Getting at least one or two additional machines here on which he can hone his skills really makes a lot of sense. Otherwise, I'm just not letting my child explore his potential.

Back at home, Mari exploited the two new visitors. Mari walked all over Johnny...

...Kuri played soccer with Jen (sadly, our backyard was in no shape for this activity, so the living room had to suffice),

and Mari continually sought out ways to cuddle with Johnny. I think, in her mind, she claimed yet another new boyfriend.

We ended our stay at Le Garage restaurant in Sausalito. This is a great little Marin restaurant. Right on the water with excellent food and a relatively chill atmosphere. It was also great for me because, for the first time in years, adults actually outnumbered the kids. Eating was actually possible!

Eventually John and Jen left, but they were quickly replaced with Sumie. It was nice to have the family back...mostly. We headed out for the one event Mimi was most sad to miss: the Marin County Fair. I've posted on this in the past and it remains one of my favorite things about this county. It's small, local, and perfect for younger kids. When it comes to rides, Kuri isn't all that adventurous, but at least he was able to get on a Jeep.

We had a ton of fun looking at the animals, eating fried food, and popping balloons for prizes (Kuri popped 3 on 5 darts!). This being Marin, we got to meet with Darth Vader!

Kuri impersonated Lord Snoke.

And the whole family took a picture with some Star Wars greats.

Before camp started I had some extra time with Kuri during the day. This meant a lot of extra Lego building. Kuri is obsessed with Voltron, so one day he asked me to build the Castle of Lions.

Not to be outdone by his papa, he constructed his own.

With Mimi gone, we had a few chances to swap in Mari for Mimi's usual swim lessons. Unlike Mimi and Kuri, Mari naturally loves the water. Since finding Hiroe-sensei, Mari and Kuri now look forward to swimming lessons, but Mari eats them up. She's a water baby.

As the weeks went on we kept to our normal schedule. One weekend, with Sumie off call, we were able to sneak out to brunch on a Sunday. We came across a pretty amazing car. Very proud to announce that even my two year old can spot a Ferrari.

Work is continuing on our yard. We have not had a driveway for the past two weeks. At least Mari and Kuri got a huge kick watching it being torn up.

With Mimi taking on such a brave adventure, I wanted to give her a nice surprise when she returned. I racked my brains and then inspiration struck thanks to a severely underpriced, and on special, Salvation Army find. Mimi has her own little Raspberry Pi computer, but the screen is small and the battery runs out quickly. With this, we finally have a family computer that the kids can use. I'm hoping to install Minecraft on it for Mimi. She's obsessed with it, but I don't feel that bad. She's creating constantly. It now takes 45 minutes for her to show me the world she's built.

Last week Sumie's oldest brother came by (he was on a work trip) and Sumie's sister, brother-in-law, and the cousins stayed over. Once again, we snapped very few pictures (the children took over), but at least we got a snap of the amazing nabe Sumie prepped and Eddie cooked.

July is Mari's last month at her daycare. This is a pretty momentous occasion. We have been sending our kids to the same daycare, up until they hit two, for the past six years. Even moving to Marin couldn't break this cycle. It's very bittersweet. Mari is definitely ready for preschool, but with her moving out, we'll miss daily contact with someone who has become a member of the family. I know we'll make visits, though, whenever we can!

We're all excited to see Mimi this Sunday. And while she's had an amazing adventure, I think she's also ready to come home. After all, she's only 8. Still, I'm tremendously thankful we've been fortunate enough to provide her with this opportunity. I didn't leave the country until I was in my mid 20s. Mimi's embracing her Japanese side, whole-heartedly, both here and in Japan. I hope we can do the same for the the whole family. It might be a stretch, but I think, in the long term, it will be worth it.

Extraordinary Ordinary Week

The last week, and two weekends, were nothing out of the ordinary. There were no vacations. There were no parties. Sumie even had to work on Saturday. And yet, looking back over the past nine days, they were oddly rather great. It's a bit baffling, though in retrospect, I think I have the kids to thank for making our little adventures - nothing more than 20 minutes from home and most of them taking part in our family room or back yard - memorable.

Two Sundays ago, we decided to head out Tennessee Valley Road in Mill Valley for a short hike to the beach with friends. Mari, noting the sunshine before we left, prepared herself.

It's rather astounding that after four years in Marin we'd never taken this roughly two mile hike out to a gorgeous, secluded beach that is only 15 minutes from our home. We'd been missing out. The trail was even, easy, and smooth enough for our little stroller. Reaching the beach, we came across a swift stream that had cut its way through the sand to the ocean. This was a perfect playground for the more adventurous among us. It's amazing how cold simply does not matter when you're presented with a beach... and you're seven.

As Mimi gamboled in the sand and water, Kuri and Mari huddled under their jackets, snacking on the sandwiches we'd prepared and spilling goldfish crackers everywhere. 

The beach really was a stunning sight - one which my pictures do absolutely no justice. We'll be back soon, with sand toys and kites.

Back at home, and bathed, we prepared for the week ahead. It would be a standard one. Sumie would work, the kids would have school, and I would continue my role as the child wrangler / chef / mr. fix-it. There were a few fun surprises throughout the week, though. Kuri spent an afternoon lining up his cars - showing off his ocd side. He was quite proud of the final presentation, though also rather devastated when Mari destroyed it.

Mimi is becoming a better big sister each day. In the midst of preparing dinner, I stepped into the family room to find that Mimi, unprompted, had decided to guide Kuri through a color-by-numbers workbook. Over half an hour of no arguing and no screen time. That's priceless.

On another night, Mimi and Kuri took inspiration from Mari, who likes to wear her favorite blanket as a cape, and they all became superheroes. Mimi, as she is wont to do, took the imaginative play a step further, forming a superhero school, complete with jumping off the couch exercises that would make your cape flutter in the breeze like a Teen Titan.

The weather, which had been a bit cold, finally swung back to traditional Marin February: sunshine and highs in the mid 60s to the low 70s. And that meant bubbles in the back yard (though not for Mari - I can only take so much mess).

The week done, we headed for Saturday. Sumie had a work conference in Berkley, and Mimi, as always, had Saturday school. Mari, Kuri, and I pottered around the house and then packed up for a trip to the small farmer's market at Larkspur Landing. There we bought some incredibly fresh, sashimi grade fish and some smoked salmon. After returning home, and a nice long nap for Mari, we then set out to retrieve Mimi in San Francisco. All morning, Kuri had been badgering me for a trip to the park. Upon our return home, I obliged.

I can't help but think of "A Hard Day's Night" when I look at this picture (and remember all the running around and rolling down the hills).

Mimi, continuing her big sister development, took Mari down the slides and pushed her in the swings.

And we all went down to explore the creek, our favorite part of the park. Sadly, it was still too cold to jump in the water and hunt for fish.

Earlier in the week, I made stuffing for gyoza (Japanese potstickers). On Tuesday, after Sumie came home from work, she gathered her helpers...

...and together they constructed 50 gyoza as their papa cleaned up in the background. 

We only got through about half of them for dinner that night, which worked out perfectly for our Saturday dinner. Hamachi (yellow tail), Sake (salmon), Maguro (tuna), and fried salmon skin paired with rice and gyoza. The only thing we were missing was miso soup.

For once, the kids ate all their food.

Sunday, our only genuinely free day, started out right with our monthly papa-son outing to Cars and Coffee. Mimi declined to go with us this time, saying Mama and Papa's bed was just too warm. It was definitely Kuri's lucky day at C&C. A Lamborghini afficionado, he was overjoyed to find there were no less than five there that day.

While a massive Lambo fan, Kuri definitely didn't turn up his nose to the Ford GT we saw...

...and he even appreciated the symmetry of our parking space. Two 911SCs sandwiched between a trio of BMWs. Not bad.

That afternoon, the whole family headed down to Tiburon to walk along the water at Blackie's Pasture. Mari and Mimi took a photo on Blackie's memorial statue...

...but Kuri just wanted to sit on a rock.

At least his sisters eventually agreed to join him! 

All told, it was two weekends and a full week remarkably like any other, but also remarkably memorable. Again, I know I have these three to thank for it. I just hope they're as well behaved this week. We'll see.

Scoring Dad Points

"Cars and Popcorn." Two great things that go great together. Wait. What? Cars and coffee, sure, but cars and popcorn are a terrible combination. Just ask any parent who has handed a bag of popcorn to his four year old in the back seat. Maybe, maybe at a drive-in theater, but those basically don't exist anymore. So, why on earth is my daughter directing traffic to "Cars and Popcorn?" Well, it all comes down to "Dad Points."

Being a stay-at-home dad, I have to find ways to perk life up a bit for the kids, and for me. It can't all be laundry, cooking, and Pokemon. I call these little perks "Dad Points." Chances to make the mundane just a little more fun (and to hopefully win a little compliance from the kids). A few examples of scoring dad points are...

Taking three kids in a sports car to get milk and mayonnaise...

...teaching Mimi about logic in coding using her own little computer...

...building a massive train set that contains another train set that contains a gas station as a means of simply cleaning up all the train track on the floor...

...and, of course, taking the kids to Cars and Coffee so Mama can rest.

These are all great ways to score some dad points while getting some important errands, cleaning, or teaching done (and ways to pad out a blog post because I haven't taken many pictures lately). This past weekend was going to need some serious dad points. Well beyond the norm. Not only was Mama on call, she was feeling a bit ill. The kids and I would need to keep the house clean (particularly the counters), get through all our meals, let Mama rest, and have a bit of fun. On Saturday, with Mimi off at Japanese school, Mari and Kuri needed to get to Marinwood park to burn off some energy (and stop destroying the house).

 

Mama and Mimi back home, it was time for Sumie to get a little rest and for the rest of us to start scheming for Sunday. We'd have a whole day together, just the four of us, and we needed to be prepared. As I cooked, and Mari wrote all over the couch, Kuri and Mimi hatched a plan. If I helped them enact it the following day, I'd definitely score some dad points.

Kuri had been fascinated with the idea of holding some kind of sale in front of our house for some time. The problem was, though, he wasn't interested in selling lemonade. He wanted something more interesting, more boy, more him. Soon, he found his hook: cars. He carefully sorted through his (now considerable) collection of Hot Wheel and Tomica cars and came up with 24 vehicles he would be willing to part with. The selection complete, Kuri looked them over and said, "I hope some other boys will like these."

Sunday morning, Mimi insisted that we needed something else to pad out our sale. We headed over to the pantry and looked up and down. Ah, popcorn! We'll sell cups of popcorn! We spent the rest of the morning drafting signs for our sale, collecting change, and figuring out the pricing: 50 cents per car and 50 cents for a cup of popcorn. Tax free, of course.

Around 11:00 I put Mari down for her nap and Mimi, Kuri and I moved our "store" out to the driveway. Kuri would handle the car sales and Mimi, she was the popcorn scooper.

The first 30 minutes were rough. Not a single person walked by and not a single car stopped. Kuri was getting discouraged. Why weren't people coming to his sale? Didn't anyone want his cars? Wasn't anyone hungry for popcorn?

The kids noticed that most of the cars they saw come down the street were turning at the corner just below our house, sadly missing our sale. The direct-to-consumer shouting of "Cars and Popcorn," though tremendously loud (and occasionally aggressive), simply wasn't working. Mimi decided we need a motion sign. Papa went in and drafted one. Mimi then ran down to the corner to direct traffic while Kuri manned the store.

Business picked up. Papa would eventually pop three more bags of popcorn. One of these was eaten entirely by Mari, who had woken from her nap and did not seem to understand the concept of selling. Just eating. Kuri managed to sell four cars, but sadly, not to any little boys. He wisely summed up the strategy for our next sale, "Papa, we need more boys to come."

And, just in case the sale wouldn't score enough dad points, while it was going on, I smoked two racks of ribs.

The sale lasted about three hours and closed as the wind began to pick up, blowing popcorn everywhere. We all ended up having a great time. And it was a great way to pick up some dad points. Not quite as great as driving Mimi across the Golden Gate in the Porsche with the top off, but still, pretty damned good.